What you will do with all that S3xual energy you have Catholic priest - Reverend Father Oselumhense Kevin

What to do with all that S3xual energy

Young people aren't the only ones who think they have so much s3xual energy to burn. We all get caught up in a web of excess energies sometimes.

And you know, excessive energy tends to become negative energy. But there's a simple (perhaps not too simple) way of channelling energy.

Yes! Even negative energy. Think about it. But it requires commitment and determination.

There comes a time in our lives when we realise that parents can't solve all our problems. There comes a moment of taking charge; of taking responsibility. And no, we can't wish these problems away by masturbating, or smoking, or drinking, or engaging in one of those compulsive behaviours. We just have to DEAL with them.

There's no other way. It's called GROWING UP.

So here's the thing! We need to learn to listen to our systems. Then we need to learn how to interpret the messages that our bodies send.

Many of us tend to agree that the most powerful energy is sexual energy. Yea? Especially young people. We're sometimes overwhelmed with thoughts of sex.

Don't get me wrong. On the one hand, we have many thinking about and fantasising about how to have sex, what it is like to have sex, at what point is sex right or wrong, etc. This pattern of thought could lead to much use of pornography (pictures and videos), which in turn could lead to self abuse (masturbation), fornication, and blah blah blah.

On the other hand, there are the really scrupulous ones who spend all their time trying NOT to think about sex or relationships, or love etc. But they keep failing and they keep wondering why.

Tell you what?

The brain interprets these signals pretty much the same way. So whether we're thinking about having sex or about how not to have sex, our brains simply register SEX, and activate the portion that deals with pleasure and fantasy, and the results end up the same. For instance, if I say "don't think about elephants", what comes to your mind? Elephants!

That's my point exactly.

The brain is like a child. It needs discipline.

We earlier said that we must learn how to listen to our bodies, right? And how to properly interpret what it is saying to us, right? This is absolutely important.

When you feel pain for instance, realise that it's pain, then ask yourself what it could mean. Are you getting sick? Are you wounded?

It's the same with sexual urges? When we get them, we must not rush after ways to try to act them out; or ways to try to enhance them.

We mustn't run off in search of pornographic materials, or a sexual partner. The idea is to not jump into action. That's why we're rational human beings.

 process has to begin from asking ourselves why we're getting these urges.

Have we been fantasising too much? Have we been sexting, or engaging in sexually instigating conversations?

Have we been avoiding some positive engagements we should have done already; like completing assignments, meeting deadlines, taking tough decisions, etc (you would be amazed how the body tends to interpret most stressors as sexual energy)?

So if we've been engaging in too much sexual fantasising or sexting, or naughty behaviours, we would need to summon the will to stop.

We must find a way to convince that little part of our brains that enough is enough. We would often need to sit that baby down and take control of it.

We need to learn to listen to what our bodies try to communicate by these sexual urges.

We must understand that our brains know there are activities we don't naturally love doing; like reading, writing, studying, painting, exercise, etc.

So, rather than engage in these activities, our bodies simply send us an alternative - fantasy! Don't buy it.

We must learn to rewire our brains. Yes! Research has shown that the mind can actually alter brain patterns and brain waves. That's why people get addicted to behaviours. That's why some repeated behavioural patterns become compulsive. But again, that's also why some seemingly useless people later become great achievers.

So is sexual energy the most powerful emotion? Not at all! Within the context of this write up, I'll wager that the most powerful emotion is fear. Oh yes! Fear can paralyse or strengthen with remarkable swiftness.

It can release adrenaline in some persons, which can make them perform super human activities. For instance, if a man is on the verge of committing adultery, and the husband of the woman comes in unexpectedly, sexual energy gives way to fear with immediate alacrity. This could give the man the ability to jump down from a storey building, and still run off with broken bones. Get the point?

On the other hand, a proper understanding of fear can bring about resolve, determination and success. This is called courage!

Finally, here's what we need to do.

There's no need to deny that we have these sexual urges. We're not the only human being on earth (we would be abnormal without them).

But our bodies aren't telling us to go have sex anytime we get sexual urges.

Our bodies might only be reacting to our naughty behavioural patterns, or they might simply be trying to avoid stress, even necessary stress.

That's why we have to master our bodies. We ought to go beyond the feeling and interpret what it means.

Negative behavioural patterns must stop, issues must be dealt with, and the body must be taken through necessary stress.

Above all, we must pray to God for the grace to stay committed to this cause.
God bless you.